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First by way of introduction some questions I'm often asked.
1. Why are you hear?
Well, Greyhawk invited me for balance. I won't be talking about politics though.
2. Can you explain your name?
Well, my mother was a Stokes and my father was a Hymington.
3. No - your first name. Is it true you are a man?
I don't know why this is so important to some people. My life partner doesn't care, in fact, most of my life partners haven't cared. Many people assume I'm a female, even though I'm named after one of the most famous male cartoon characters ever.
3. Who are you?
I'm the offspring of two prominent east coast families. I don't need to "work" for a living. For a long time I commented on blogs and for a little while I had my own, but the stress was too much so I gave it up. My nerves were already shot from the war and I just couldn't fight the good fight anymore. After Dean was defeated in the primaries I realized the Democrats had sold out to the Wingnuts too, and that was the last straw. Anyhoo, say it loud, I'm back, and I'm proud!
I won't be talking about politics though. So that explains the title of the post. I'll be talking about football. I don't like football, it's excessively violent, discriminates against women and abuses minorites and insults ethnic groups like the Redskins. But last year I was able to predict the outcome of every game all year correctly - including the Super Bowl. Not only that, but I did it before the season started. I'll be giving my predictions here at least weekly.
I'm especially looking forward to this season. There will be a lot of pivotal games. Let me tell you what that means. This occurs when the left side of the offensive line is much stronger than the right side of the defense - its that way in all football teams just like in America the left is stronger, smarter, and faster than the right. But the left side of the other teams defense is stronger than the right side of the opposing offense, of course. So what happens then is the overpowering force of the lefts forces the rights backwards. The result is a circular motion around the quarter back (who is a democrat because republicans only think the world revolves around them) called a pivot. This is what we NFL insiders refer to as a "pivotal" game.
Anyhoo, let me tell you straight up the Patriots will be undefeated. Just like the patriots who oppose the war in Iraq will be undefeated.
Now here's my picks for this upcoming weekend's games.
Green Bay 10, San Diego 7
N.Y. Jets 10, Detroit 3
New England 23, Cincinnati 13
St. Louis 17, Chicago 13
Minnesota 27, Kansas City 16
Seattle 34, New Orleans 15
Tampa Bay 20, Tennessee 17 (OT)
Atlanta 16, Baltimore 3
Jacksonville 27, Miami 17
Buffalo 17, Indianapolis 10
Denver 20, Houston 14
Cleveland 17, N.Y. Giants 14
Carolina 28, Washington 10
Arizona 13, Dallas 11
San Francisco 21, Oakland 13
Pittsburgh 38, Philadelphia 31
You'll notice I picked some "upsets". This means people will be upset when I am proved right. I always am. They always are.
