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The Mudville Gazette is written and produced by Greyhawk, the call sign of a real military guy currently serving somewhere in Iraq. Unless otherwise credited, the opinions expressed are those of the author, and nothing here is to be taken as representing the official position of or endorsement by the United States Department of Defense or any of its subordinate components. Furthermore, I will occasionally use satire or parody herein. The bottom line: it's my house.

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« From the Front | Main | Sunday Funnies »

April 30, 2005

Just Another Stripe (Down the Toilet of Life)

Greyhawk

Joe Chenelly, who did a fine job presenting MilBloggers in the Army Times, quoted me during an NPR interview recently:

On particular blogger, who goes by the handle Greyhawk, recommended that anyone blogging, when they write, to write assuming that the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff is going to read your blog.
True - but the full quote is to write like the Chairman and your mother are going to read your blog. I invite any reader here to decide which of those two people would be more embarrassed by the following (by the way mom, stop reading now) :
Everyone has a vision of how they want to remember their combat experience and particularly how they want others to view their combat service. Most soldiers, and especially infantrymen, want to realize all their Jerry Bruckheimer-fueled fantasies with macho military fervor. All I did was include more details in hopes of providing a more honest and humorous perspective of what soldiering is typically like. I could write ?We went on a raid tonight. We smashed the gate down and cleared the house, but the guy we were looking for wasn?t home.? But instead I?d write ?Tonight we went on a raid. It wasn?t till 3am and I couldn?t sleep so I masturbated before we left. On the way to the raid we got lost, but after driving around for a while we finally found the house. We tried to breech the gate of the outer wall, but in the process accidentally ended up knocking the entire wall over. After clearing the house, we realized it was the wrong one. Once we figured out where the correct house was, we raided it. But the guy we were looking for wasn?t home. As I was pulling security on an alley, I realized that the chow we had for dinner wasn?t agreeing with me and when I tried to fart ended up shitting my pants a little. Once we finished searching the house, we hopped back in our Humvees and took what we thought was our planned egress route, but instead found ourselves on a dead end canal road. While turning around, one of the Humvees got stuck in the mud. Most raids do not go this badly. We eventually made it back to our base safe and sound. My ass had started to chafe from when I ?sharted?, so I took a shower, masturbated, and went to bed.? (This, by the way, is a true story.) If I wrote a story like this, my commander would spend thirty minutes condemning me for portraying our unit as incompetent and unprofessional, but charge me with violating OPSEC because I disclosed tactical details on how we perform breeches.
That's Jason Hartley of Just Another Soldier notoriety. His blog was shut down by his commander, but he later put it back online. That earned him an Article 15, and punishment that included a demotion and a fine. Hartley is also interviewed in the NPR piece linked above, which goes to great lengths to discuss censorship and military blogs. He uses the opportunity to insult his fellow military bloggers, insisting that those who are allowed to continue blogging are producing "insipid" content. (This judgment from a guy who once posted a picture of himself on the toilet, as he bragged to NPR.) He finds the Dagger Jag blog especially offensive, citing it in his NPR interview and, apparently, every other chance he gets:
Apparently our brigade JAG guy (2 BCT 1 ID) was too busy with his own blog (daggerjag.blogspot.com or something like that) to process my article 15 while we were in Iraq, so it didn?t get resolved.
That's a very serious accusation to make - especially about a blog updated as infrequently as Dagger Jag was. Reading that comment one might be tempted to speculate that Spc Harltley has a problem with typing faster than he thinks. This is the blogosphere, after all, and such news tends to get around. How? Glad you asked.

This case illustrates perfectly the absurdity of attempting to regulate military blogs. Once his blog was shut down Hartley began sending his observations out via an email list - one that anyone who wished could sign up for at his site. Of course, several bloggers did so, and they posted his email on their blogs, and as a result his words appear on even more web sites and reach an even larger audience than if he was simply running a blog.

Still, Just Another Soldier is the example cited time and again by those who insist that military bloggers are oppressed and censored by "The Army". There's another angle that is repeatedly misinterpreted in the MilBlogs story - blame "The Army" all you want, it's the individual commanders who determine if a soldier's activities are prejudicial to morale, order, and discipline. Jason's obviously made his decision. And as he seems to comprehend (based on the above excerpt) the reality is that Hartley's work violates the mother side of Greyhawk's rule above. And while some Americans are interested in the former SGT's uninsipid toilet habits, the Chairman doesn't care, and his commander was obviously unimpressed.

Posted by Greyhawk at 08:08 PM | Permalink | Comments (15) |