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A day after being ordered to stop attacking civilians or else be labelled a terrorist organization, the Moro Islamic Liberation Front (MILF) has struck again in the Philippines. In their latest attack they robbed local officials after stopping their bus, then set the vehicle on fire.
As the mood in the Philippines grows increasingly tense, a former President of a major western power realizes that he is uniquely qualified to help subdue the MILF, defuse this highly volitile situation, and perhaps establish some sort of pathetic legacy for himself.
"No one knows MILF like I know MILF" Stated Mr Bill Clinton as he gave his world famous thumbs up and wink at a press conference. "I am the man for this job."
Having obtained a tacit go-ahead from the current administration, Mr Clinton's immediate goal will be to assemble a crack team of MILF experts, train and equip, then deploy ASAP into the deepest bush country in the island nation.
"I'd rather not use the term 'Bush country', as much as it pains me, knowing it is the proper term to use for MILF pursuit operations. No doubt that warm, moist, tropical jungle will present some problems, but with the right team and the right equipment I have faith I can overcome all obstacles and bring the MILF to their knees."
Mr. Clinton's progress will be reported here in the Mudville Gazette. We wish him great success.
Mrs. Clinton could not be reached for comment.
