The reader will kindly forgive any tendency to rough language or behavior on the part of the site owner...
TMGlogo2006-2007phs-copy.jpg
"Good people sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf."
TMGbloglabel1 copy.gif

TMGbloglabel3 copy.gif
TMG MONTHLY ARCHIVES
[-]



TMGbloglabel10 copy.gif

TMGbloglabel2 copy.gif
The Mudville Gazette Feeds

 

Add to Technorati Favorites
Technorati Profile
add.gif
Add to Google
addtomyyahoo4.gif
ngsub1.gif sub_modern5.gif

xml.gif rdf.png atom feed.jpg

digg.jpg

Find the best blogs at Blogs.com.

pl-news.gif

tvc_logo_small.png

Mrsg- Greyhawk's Profile
Mrsg- Greyhawk's Facebook profile
Create Your Badge
TMGbloglabel5 copy.gif
TMGbloglabel6 copy.gif
350.jpg
Greetings! You are reading an article from The Mudville Gazette. To reach the front page, with all the latest news and views, click the logo above or "main" below. Thanks for stopping by!
« The Green | Main | Once a Marine »

May 30, 2010

greyhawk copy sm.png

Graduation Night - Moon over Yusufiyah

By Greyhawk

"When the battle is over, when the Three Hundred have gone down to death, then will all Greece look to the Spartans, to see how they bear it.
"But who, lady, who will the Spartans look to?
"
- Steven Pressfield, Gates of Fire

A note from our friend Robert Stokely...

The Stokely family sat in a football stadium on a warm Friday night just before Memorial Day 2001 to watch Mike Stokely graduate high school. He already had boot camp / basic training and a year in the National Guard under his belt and would be heading off for Advanced Individual Training at Ft. Gordon in a few weeks. His little sister, Abbey, almost nine, couldn't let go of him, even to have a photo taken with Mike and their brother, Wes. yus1.jpg She swung on his arm adoringly - her look of love says it all.

On the morning of August 16, 2005, as my wife Retta and I sat with Wes and Abbey just after breaking the news to them of Mikes death earler that morning, then 13 year old Abbey buried her head into my shoulder, sobbing these words: "he was supposed to chase away my first boyfriend, he was supposed to cheer at my graduation from high school, he was supposed to be an uncle to my children..." These words seared my heart, broken as it was. I shall never forget them. She lost her oldest brother that day, her "Bubs" which she called him short for his nickname, Bubba.

Tonight, May 27, 2010 at the football stadium for Northgate High School in Sharpsburg GA, Abbey Stokely graduated last with her class. She has had a rough five years that started with Mike's death in Iraq. Five months later, she and I were broad sided by a driver who ran a stop sign at 45 plus and rolled and flipped us several times, shearing her right rear passenger door away. She spent 18 months recovering from her serious neck, back, and head injury. Those two events might seem enough to cause a student to graduate last.

But more came her way for just a month or so after she was fully recovered from the wreck. She was bitten by a tick and came down with Lyme Disease. In GA and the south there is medical bias against diagnosing or even recognizing that Lyme Disease exists here and doctor after doctor refused to treat her for Lyme, saying she just needed psychological help due to her brother's death and the car wreck. She missed over half her class instruction time during her sophomore and junior years, essentially home schooling herself between extensive rest periods, migraines, sickness, dizziness, and other symptoms that doctors said was just "in her head" and not Lyme. She and her mother traveled out of state to see doctors who might treat her for Lyme and finally we found a doctor about two hours from our home in GA that started aggressive treatment for Lyme and she finally started getting better. That might be enough by itself, but especially with the continuing grief over her brother's loss and her own near death experience to cause her to be last, but more was to come.

As she ended her junior year her best friend for several years had become her first boyfriend - the one Mike was supposed to chase away. But I think he might have let this fine young man who had been so good to his sister in all of her grief, injuries and sickness stay around. A gentleman in every respect was Thomas Broadwater. A fine son and brother-in-law he might have one day made. They went to the prom together and a great night it was, but then the next day my mother / Abbey's grandmother fell seriously ill at age 81 and died a week later. Looking back, it is about the most normal thing that has happened to Abbey in these five years. Her "Nana" adored her as she adored Nana. Enough you might think. But not yet, for three weeks after burying her Nana, Abbey Stokely buried her best friend, her first boyfriend, Thomas Broadwater, who died from complications of surgery on one of his lungs.

So, you might think that was enough and it was almost too much for her to bear. Thomas was also her classmate and supposed to graduate with Abbey and 395 others tonight. This last year has not been easy to say the least. Surely, this explains why she was the last. She wanted her brother Mike to be there to cheer for her and she felt it so unfair that Thomas wasn't there to get his diploma. And that weighed heavily on her. We were tense to see if she would get through this graduation tonight, an emotional time for her to say the least.

But none of these things are why Abbey Stokely was last to graduate with her class tonight. Abbey Stokely graduated last tonight because she was the Valedictorian and by tradition the last to receive her diploma and graduate. Before rising to give her speech to send her classmates into the future, she watched with bittersweet pride as a member of Thomas Broadwater's family came forward to receive his diploma posthumously. Then, she nailed her speech in front of thousands of friends, family and strangers. Just as she finished, a downpour hit and drenched the graduates and the crowd. A mile away not a drop.

I first wondered why it rained there. But then, as I saw the rising full moon emerge from behind the clouds, The same Moon over Yusufiyah I watched night after night as Mike served in Iraq, even as I prayed for his safety and wished to feel close to him, knowing he had seen the same moon 8 hours before. It was then I wondered if it was Mike's tears of joy and pride for his sister that had just drenched us all.

firstandlast.jpg

The Moon over Yusufiyah was shining bright over Sharpsburg tonight.

And I was reminded again that the highest cost of Freedom is A Lifetime of Love.

Robert Stokely
proud dad of Abbey Stokely, Wes Stokely
and Mike Stokely KIA 16 AUG 05 near Yusufiyah Iraq

Fiddlers Green a.jpg

Abbey produced this memorial slideshow for Mike in 2007, on the second anniversary of his death. I first saw it not far from Yusufiyah, where we were finishing the work he and so many others had begun. Those were grim days, but from the Stokely family I gained strength to carry on.


"But who, lady, who will the Spartans look to? To you."
- Steven Pressfield, Gates of Fire

Original post: 2010-05-28 06:26:12



Posted by Greyhawk / May 30, 2010 10:45 AM | Permalink

1 TrackBack

Memorial Day from Another Voice on May 29, 2010 7:31 PM

Sometimes others say what needs to be said… A question from Lew Waters, and an answer via  Greyhawk at Mudville. Our current national zeitgeist demands both when considering a day dedicated to those who’ve fallen. Most do forget, and there... Read More

34 Comments

Robert, as a weather forecaster with 24 years professional experience, I think you're exactly right about that rain.

Abbey, your courage and strength do your big brother and your entire family proud. Congratulations on this tremendous achievement. Hugs and God bless.

Linked Here.

Proud of her Robert. And what a beuatiful young woman she's become. I'll gladly fulfill Mike's role of chasing off the boys who come sniffing 'round. It'll give me practice, anyways.

--Chuck

Powerful! that's all I can say.
SF
Taco

GOD bless the Stokely family and friends. I would be humbled and honored to have them as friends. I am sure that rain was tears of joy.

ThomNJ:

Consider us old friends - thank you for your words of encouragement and support.

Congratulations, Abbey!

And yes, Robert, I also agree about the rain.

Bless you all.

To The Stokely Family:

That's what families are all about! What a beautiful young girl and proud sister she is. God Bless you Abbey and I for one think it was your brother's tears that rained down on you at graduation :-) He will always be there for you!

Much love from a proud D-Day Daughter,
Louise Doucette-Johnson

To the Stokely Family:

Congratulations! Thank you so much for sharing this with all of us.

Abbey, congratulations! Tears of joy, pride, and happiness rained down. My best to you and all your family.

Robert, doubt help is needed, but will be glad to join Chuck in shooing duty.

You take right flank, Chuck has the left; thanks for your years of support and friendship.

Congratulations Abbey!!
You are a beautiful young lady, your generation could learn alot about strength and perseverance from you. Along with what really matters in life.
Gob bless you and your family

Abbey & Family~ Thank you, for sharing this Journey. My Congrats! to the Graduate!

God Bless you Abbey and all Gold Star families out there. Your courage and perserverance is an outstanding example to all of us. Bubs must indeed be smiling through the tears.

Congratulations Abbey and the entire Stokely Family.

Courage in the face of sacrifice, loss and challenge of impressive proportions. This is the type of story that demonstrates that we should not mourn for the future. Despite all claims to the contrary, there is greatness in each generation, and here is evidence.

Thank you for sharing this triumph of life. Good luck to the entire family going forward!

Congratulations Abbey..you have an army in heaven urging you on!

Thank you for sharing

There is clearly one thing missing from that young lady's education. She never learned the meaning of the word 'quit.'


I'd like to add something, but words seem to fail me. All I can think of is how, time after time, we Americans somehow seem to make it right. When someone falls, another steps up to take their place. When a family suffers such a loss, it seems like we all suffer, and through that, become so much closer.

God Bless her and her family.

Remarkable, touching, and inspiring. I've got to learn to stop asking where we find young people such as Abbey and Mike and just accept and appreciate the fact that we do. Each demonstrated such strength and sacrifice at such a young age that I'm humbled by their stories. Thank you for sharing.

You've got some family there, Robert. Some family.... *smile*

I am smiling. When all is said and done, I am very blessed to be the dad of three wonderful children who grew to be adults who live life with purpose and certainly bring joy to my life.

I am sure I had sommething worth saying, but I seem to have gotten something in my eyes here, and am having trouble typing...

...all this dust here on the internet. Horrible for eyes.

May I reproduce this article on my blog? It's beautiful, and would be eye-opening for many people.
I am filled with gratitude for your lilfe, the lives of your familes, and all the people who serve our country. Thank you.

Please feel free to post on your blog, and would appreciate you giving link credit to Mudville Gazette

thank you for your interest, support, and encouragement to our family and honoring us with your blog post.

Robert Stokely

Too many of our fallen heroes seem forgotten today. How wonderful to see that this will not be the case with Abbey and her family.

Words fail me. Except perhaps for one. "Humbled." I feel humbled by this story, and grateful that our country has people like Abbey, her brother, and the rest of her family. Pretty big shoes for the rest of us to fill. But hey, at least we can try...

I'll never forget Mike's story I read on the Hell on Heels blog so long ago. It comes as no surprise that his sister Abbey has such strength. A strong nation can only be built on a strong foundation such as the Stokely represents. Salutes, and thanks, from a N.M. PGR.

I cannot appropriately express my overwhelming humbleness after reading your story. Thank-you Stokely Family for your sacrifice and courage. Abbey, you are an inspiration to us all!

As a father to a little girl, my heart broke as I began to read your story. As your narrative continued, I felt enormous empathy for this young woman, struggling with so much grief at a young age, who managed to graduate despite all of her struggles. I had chills up my spine (OK, and maybe a tear in my eye) as you revealed that this beautiful young woman not only overcame these trials, but triumphed over them.

I thank you and your family for your sacrifices, and congratulate you and your daughter on her achievements.

I am humbled. There are no words...

The Stokely family (and all the other military families) have my deepest gratitude for their sacrifices on my & the country's behalf. My tears & prayers are for you all. God bless & be with all our heroes and their families!

Way to go, Abbey! Look out world. :)

Robert, I hope the joy of the day put a little extra sparkle in that rain. It's no surprise that yet another Stokely inspires me.

With gratitude as always for Mike's service and all your family's sacrifices.

350.jpg
Mrs G copy.png

November 26, 2010


America@war
[Greyhawk]
I think anyone who's ever pondered the "comment" option - once only available on blogs and bulletin boards, now ubiquitous on almost any web site - will appreciate this:
The so-called faculty of writing is not so much a faculty of writing as it is a faculty of thinking. When a man says, "I have an idea but I can't express it"; that man hasn't an idea but merely a vague feeling. If a man has a feeling of that kind, and will sit down for a half an hour and persistently try to put into writing what he feels, the probabilities are at least 90 percent that he will either be able to record it, or else realize that he has no idea at all. In either case, he will do himself a benefit.

That's wisdom from the past, captured for posterity at the US Naval Institute, shared via the web on the institute's 137th anniversary.

From their about page:

The Naval Institute shall remain

INDEPENDENT - A non-profit member association, with no government support, that does not lobby for special interests;

NON-PARTISAN - An independent, professional military association with a mission, goals and objectives that transcend political affiliations; and shall encourage

IDEAS - Through its respected journals Proceedings and Naval History, its conferences, its books and its online content, in support of those who serve.

"The Naval Institute has three core activities," among them, History and Preservation:

The Naval Institute also has recently introduced Americans at War, a living history of Americans at war in their own words and from their own experiences. These 90-second vignettes convey powerful stories of inspiration, pride, and patriotism.

Take a look at the collection, and you'll see it's not limited to accounts from those who served on ships at sea, members of the other branches are well-represented.

I'm fortunate to have met USNI's Mary Ripley, she's responsible for the institute's oral history program (and she's the daughter of the late John Ripley, whose story is told here). She also deserves much credit for their blog. ("We're not the Navy nor any government agency. Blog and comment freely.") We met at a milblog conference - Mary knew (and I would come to realize) that milbloggers are the 21st-century version of exactly what the US Naval Institute is all about. Once that light bulb came on in my head, I mentioned a vague idea for a project to her - milblogs as the 21st century oral history that they are.

"Put that in writing," she said (of course - see first paragraph above!) - and here's part of the result.

Shortly after the first tent was pitched by the American military in Iraq a wire was connected to a computer therein, and the internet was available to a generation of Americans at war - many of whom had grown up online. From that point on, at any given moment, somewhere in Iraq a Soldier, Sailor, Airman or Marine was at a keyboard sharing the events of his or her day with the folks back home. While most would simply fire off an email, others took advantage of the (then) relatively new online blogging platforms to post their thoughts and experiences for the entire world to see. The milblog was born - and from that moment to this stories detailing everything from the most mundane aspects of camp life to intense combat action (often described within hours of the event) have been available on the web...

And et cetera - but since you're reading this on a milblog, you probably knew that. And you know that milblogs aren't just blogs written by troops at war, that many friends, family members, and supporters likewise documented their story of America at war online in near-real time, as those stories developed.

The diversity in membership of that group is broad, the one thing we all have in common is the impulse to make sense of the seemingly senseless, and communicate the tale - for each of us that impulse was strong enough to overcome whatever barriers prevent the vast majority of people from doing the same. Everyone at some point has some vague idea they believe should be shared - we were the people who, from some combination of internal and external urging, found and spent those many half hours persistently trying to write it down.

*****

But where will all that be in another 137 years? Or five or ten, for that matter. That's something I've asked myself since at least 2004 - when I wrote this:

Closing Blogs is nothing new. So many site's owners just give up on their own. They come and go, you know, these MilBloggers do. Like any other sort of blogger. Many post in the lonely down hours far from home, spill their guts for the world, then abandon their spots when the tour of duty is up. They have lives again somewhere in the world, and no need to share the details. So it goes.

Many are truly gone - no site left at all. "The page cannot be found." Other blogs remain, like abandoned defensive positions in shifting desert sands.

Membership in the ghost battalion has grown in the years since, and an ever growing majority of those abandoned-but-still-standing sites are vanishing. Have you checked out Lt Smash's site lately? How about Sgt Hook's? If you're a long-time milblog reader you know the first widely-read milblog from Operation Iraq Freedom and the first widely-read milblog from Afghanistan are both gone from the web. If you're a relative newcomer to this world you may never even have heard of them - or the dozens upon dozens of others who carried forth the standard they set down.

If you have a vague notion that something should be done about that, (a notion I've heard expressed more than once...) then you and I and the good folks at the US Naval Institute are in agreement. Preserving the history documented by the milbloggers is just one of the goals of the milblog project, the once-vague idea that we're now making real.

And it's a big idea, if I say so myself - too big to explain in one simple blog post, so stand by for more. Likewise, it's too big a task to be accomplished by just one person. So if you're a milblogger (and exactly what is a milblogger? is a topic for much further discussion on its own) I'm asking for your help. All I'll really need is just a little bit (maybe just one or two of those half hours...) of your time, and your willingness to tell the tale.

We've already made history, it's time to save it.

(More to follow...)




Posted 4:02 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) |

TMGbloglabel7copy.gif
The Mudville Gazette is the on-line voice of an American warrior and his wife who stands by him. They prefer to see peaceful change render force of arms unnecessary. Until that day they stand fast with those who struggle for freedom, strike for reason, and pray for a better tomorrow.
TMGrecentcomments.gif
  • Lisa-in-DC: Way to go, Abbey! Look out world. :) Robert, I read more
  • Beth H: The Stokely family (and all the other military families) have read more
  • Anna: I am humbled. There are no words... read more
  • Mike: As a father to a little girl, my heart broke read more
  • Rolf Kristen: I cannot appropriately express my overwhelming humbleness after reading your read more
  • robert stokely: You take right flank, Chuck has the left; thanks for read more
  • Solo: I'll never forget Mike's story I read on the Hell read more
  • Denise-Mary Pope: Words fail me. Except perhaps for one. "Humbled." I feel read more
  • robert stokely: Please feel free to post on your blog, and would read more
  • Lew Waters: Too many of our fallen heroes seem forgotten today. How read more

MBC2010.jpg

MILBLOGS NEWS

*****

Latest Posts From MilBlogs

*****

milblogsa1.jpg Prev | List | Random | Next
Join
Powered by RingSurf!
TMGbloglabel2 copy.gif
The Dawn Patrol Feeds

 

Add to Google Reader or Homepage Subscribe in NewsGator Online Add to netvibes Add to Plusmo myaol_cta1.gif

xml.gif rdf.png atom feed.jpg

TMGbloglabel8copy.gif

TMGbloglabel9 copy.gif
Blah Blah Blah
me220.JPG

The Mudville Gazette is written and produced by Greyhawk, who recently retired from 24 years of active duty in the US military, but will maintain this disclaimer: Unless otherwise credited, the opinions expressed are those of the author, and nothing here is to be taken as representing the official position of or endorsement by the United States Department of Defense or any of its subordinate components.

Furthermore, I will occasionally use satire or parody herein. The bottom line: it's my house.

I like having visitors to my house. I hope you are entertained. I fight for your right to free speech, and am thrilled when you exercise said rights here. Comments and e-mails are welcome, but all such communication is to be assumed to be 1)the original work of any who initiate said communication and 2)the property of the Mudville Gazette, with free use granted thereto for publication in electronic or written form. If you do NOT wish to have your message posted, write "CONFIDENTIAL" in the subject line of your email.

Original content copyright © 2003 - 2011 by Greyhawk. Fair, not-for-profit use of said material by others is encouraged, as long as acknowledgement and credit is given, to include the url of the original source post. Other arrangements can be made as needed.

Contact: greyhawk at mudvillegazette dot com

andsm.jpg

*****

Tending Distant
Fires


Far from hearth and home, watching
Cold alone but not alone
On distant shore and only wanting
Safe return and little more

What tales we'll tell
When that time comes
When tales can be told

When things grim
Seem far away
When other fires go cold

Some distant sunset, vision fading
Memories remain
And tired eyes gaze 'pon folded flags
While distant drums beat their refrain

Saluting fallen friends whose names
And youth will never fade
Here's to those on other shores,
for them live well, the price is paid

- Greyhawk,
Baghdad,
December 2004