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 Greetings! You are reading an article from The Mudville Gazette. To reach the front page, with all the latest news and views, click the logo above or "main" below. Thanks for stopping by! October 27, 2007 Fox on the AirfieldBy GreyhawkBobby Calvan's web page is back on line. I hope he continues to update frequently. Honestly I think it will be a worthwhile read. But Bobby Calvan wasn't the first reporter to try and "throw his weight around" in Iraq, and probably won't be the last. So I offer some post-Calvan advice for reporters in Iraq. Once upon a time, on my last visit to Iraq, an unauthorized vehicle accessed and attempted to cross the airfield that is the center of a very large military installation here. This caused some degree of concern among folks whose job it is to kill people who do things like that. However, instead of killing them from a nice safe distance, they elected to intercept this non-descript vehicle and force it to stop. I suppose I should explain the key word "airfield" in the above paragraph. This doesn't mean a "field full of air" that Republicans have designated for their own private use, it's actually a "field" where airplanes land and takeoff. It may not seem fair, but we generally don't let cars share this pavement even though it's quicker to drive straight across than to go around and this hurts women and children the most. Anyhow, there were two passengers within, who claimed to be in the employ of a very famous television news organization which I will not identify beyond saying it's named after a small furry animal. One (henceforth "the talent") was, in addition to being exceptionally qualified, a fabulous babe - what we used to call a "Fox". But I honestly can not recall her name. (If anyone can tell me the identity of a fabulous babe reporter for a news network named after a small furry animal who was in Iraq during the late fall/early winter 2004-2005 that would prob'ly be her.) She sat quietly and behaved herself during the ensuing adventure. (I mention the fabulous babe part because although I can't confirm it I suspect that her sitting there quietly being a fabulous babe might have saved her companion from eating sand. Life is funny like that.) The other (henceforth "shotgun" though he was actually driving and unarmed) who worked for the same organization as the It would be fun to say he woke up a few seconds later face down in the sands of ancient Mesopotamia, but that didn't happen. He was allowed to strut and mutter and explain to some of the lowest ranking enlisted GIs in Iraq how he was going to make their lives miserable as they verified via radio contact whether he should be shot or arrested. For some reason, the process took an extraordinary long time to complete. But ultimately they were identified as relatively harmless twits, then they were politely escorted off the flightline and pointed in the right direction for the long trip around the perimeter. Anyhow, moral of the story: Do not attempt to convince a low ranking GI in Iraq that you have life or death power over him. In addition to the fact that the reverse is true, there are at least two other reasons to avoid this approach: 1. Somewhere behind him is a guy with one more stripe than he has who actually has that power, and that guy loves nothing more than clobbering people who eff with his troop. This is true up the chain of command. He knows this. He is laughing at you. 2. Even if there was some weak link in that chain where your influence is that great, the low ranking guy is in Iraq. In fact, there's a saying here: "What are they gonna do? Send me to Iraq?" Still, I suspect that as they drove away, dipstick was probably bragging to the talent (and making a mental draft of a letter to the suits) about how he had delivered them from the morons. And by the way, don't even think about threatening me to get me to reveal the name of the news network involved in my story. It ain't gonna happen. Next: Change in the Weather Posted by Greyhawk / October 27, 2007 2:08 PM | Permalink 21 Comments |
November 26, 2010America@war [Greyhawk]
I think anyone who's ever pondered the "comment" option - once only available on blogs and bulletin boards, now ubiquitous on almost any web site - will appreciate this:
The so-called faculty of writing is not so much a faculty of writing as it is a faculty of thinking. When a man says, "I have an idea but I can't express it"; that man hasn't an idea but merely a vague feeling. If a man has a feeling of that kind, and will sit down for a half an hour and persistently try to put into writing what he feels, the probabilities are at least 90 percent that he will either be able to record it, or else realize that he has no idea at all. In either case, he will do himself a benefit. That's wisdom from the past, captured for posterity at the US Naval Institute, shared via the web on the institute's 137th anniversary. From their about page:
"The Naval Institute has three core activities," among them, History and Preservation: The Naval Institute also has recently introduced Americans at War, a living history of Americans at war in their own words and from their own experiences. These 90-second vignettes convey powerful stories of inspiration, pride, and patriotism. Take a look at the collection, and you'll see it's not limited to accounts from those who served on ships at sea, members of the other branches are well-represented. I'm fortunate to have met USNI's Mary Ripley, she's responsible for the institute's oral history program (and she's the daughter of the late John Ripley, whose story is told here). She also deserves much credit for their blog. ("We're not the Navy nor any government agency. Blog and comment freely.") We met at a milblog conference - Mary knew (and I would come to realize) that milbloggers are the 21st-century version of exactly what the US Naval Institute is all about. Once that light bulb came on in my head, I mentioned a vague idea for a project to her - milblogs as the 21st century oral history that they are. "Put that in writing," she said (of course - see first paragraph above!) - and here's part of the result. Shortly after the first tent was pitched by the American military in Iraq a wire was connected to a computer therein, and the internet was available to a generation of Americans at war - many of whom had grown up online. From that point on, at any given moment, somewhere in Iraq a Soldier, Sailor, Airman or Marine was at a keyboard sharing the events of his or her day with the folks back home. While most would simply fire off an email, others took advantage of the (then) relatively new online blogging platforms to post their thoughts and experiences for the entire world to see. The milblog was born - and from that moment to this stories detailing everything from the most mundane aspects of camp life to intense combat action (often described within hours of the event) have been available on the web... And et cetera - but since you're reading this on a milblog, you probably knew that. And you know that milblogs aren't just blogs written by troops at war, that many friends, family members, and supporters likewise documented their story of America at war online in near-real time, as those stories developed. The diversity in membership of that group is broad, the one thing we all have in common is the impulse to make sense of the seemingly senseless, and communicate the tale - for each of us that impulse was strong enough to overcome whatever barriers prevent the vast majority of people from doing the same. Everyone at some point has some vague idea they believe should be shared - we were the people who, from some combination of internal and external urging, found and spent those many half hours persistently trying to write it down. But where will all that be in another 137 years? Or five or ten, for that matter. That's something I've asked myself since at least 2004 - when I wrote this:
Membership in the ghost battalion has grown in the years since, and an ever growing majority of those abandoned-but-still-standing sites are vanishing. Have you checked out Lt Smash's site lately? How about Sgt Hook's? If you're a long-time milblog reader you know the first widely-read milblog from Operation Iraq Freedom and the first widely-read milblog from Afghanistan are both gone from the web. If you're a relative newcomer to this world you may never even have heard of them - or the dozens upon dozens of others who carried forth the standard they set down. If you have a vague notion that something should be done about that, (a notion I've heard expressed more than once...) then you and I and the good folks at the US Naval Institute are in agreement. Preserving the history documented by the milbloggers is just one of the goals of the milblog project, the once-vague idea that we're now making real. And it's a big idea, if I say so myself - too big to explain in one simple blog post, so stand by for more. Likewise, it's too big a task to be accomplished by just one person. So if you're a milblogger (and exactly what is a milblogger? is a topic for much further discussion on its own) I'm asking for your help. All I'll really need is just a little bit (maybe just one or two of those half hours...) of your time, and your willingness to tell the tale. We've already made history, it's time to save it. (More to follow...) Posted 4:02 PM | Permalink |
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The Mudville Gazette is the on-line voice of an American warrior and his wife who stands by him. They prefer to see peaceful change render force of arms unnecessary. Until that day they stand fast with those who struggle for freedom, strike for reason, and pray for a better tomorrow.
 
 
 Furthermore, I will occasionally use satire or parody herein. The bottom line: it's my house. I like having visitors to my house. I hope you are entertained. I fight for your right to free speech, and am thrilled when you exercise said rights here. Comments and e-mails are welcome, but all such communication is to be assumed to be 1)the original work of any who initiate said communication and 2)the property of the Mudville Gazette, with free use granted thereto for publication in electronic or written form. If you do NOT wish to have your message posted, write "CONFIDENTIAL" in the subject line of your email. Original content copyright © 2003 - 2011 by Greyhawk. Fair, not-for-profit use of said material by others is encouraged, as long as acknowledgement and credit is given, to include the url of the original source post. Other arrangements can be made as needed. Contact: greyhawk at mudvillegazette dot com  Tending Distant Far from hearth and home, watching What tales we'll tell When things grim Some distant sunset, vision fading Saluting fallen friends whose names - Greyhawk, Baghdad, December 2004 |
And that dear friends is why you should not believe your own P.R. and why you shoud not tweak the nose of the dragon!
What a putz!
A post filled with nothing but stories of the Drive Bys (I include small furry animals in that epithet on occasions such as this) getting their comeuppance from our boys with the M16s would be fabulous. I could read those all day long.
I'm certain that you're right about the fabulous babe sitting there looking hot is basically what kept Mr. Ignorant from munching sand. He got lucky, and yes they probably were laughing at the twit. I was an SP and once saw a master sergeant butt stroke a major who was trying to take a short cut and tried to bull through us. The major was the one who got in trouble.
Chip
Hawk - great post. unfortunamente, i suspect that there are MANY more examples of the type of behavior you describe, i.e reporters around the world getting themselves in trouble with the local doggies and then going home to write how "all the troops are warmongering bloodthirsty triggerhappy kids with no job prospects and gee isnt Bush a total war criminal?"
i cant help but observe, though that even as you do the honorable thing and not rat out the offending reporter by name, there are lots and lots of people in the intertubesnet, and somehow i dont think that you will have to do anything but sit back and watch as this buffoonish witless dolt (who should have been more concerned about the safety of his talent babe than he was about mouthing off to a trooper)is properly exposed, tarred and feathered.
well done, though, and thanks for your service.
What's interesting to me is that literally *all* the defenses of these morons (Calvan, Rrrrrrrobert Aguilar, whoever) fall into a single category: "This is the way we ('journalists') do it" *as if* that makes such behavior okay. They apparently simply don't see that such behavior (which they would probably not approve at, say, one of their award gatherings) is in any way wrong. They also do not see that behavior like this is now incredibly easy to see and report and be disseminated and that their 'readers' mostly really don't like it.
And they probably don't understand why their readership/viewership is declining.
Very entertaining, but at least that hood ornament didn't write blag about how he served his country by telling a thing or two to the helpless soldier who knew nothing of proper etiquette .
Over the course of my career I've been involved with many, many situations like the one you describe (never in hostile territory, but frequently on military bases and other secure areas.)
I've found that threatening, bullying and blustering doesn't work nearly so well as abject begging.
"If I don't make that deadline, I'll miss my flight and my daughter is playing in her league championships tomorrow."
"Please, it's my anniversary and my wife has a whole big dinner planned."
"I'm sorry, I've had a really crappy day and it's going to go down hill from here no matter what. I know it's not your problem, but if you could just XXX I'd really appreciate it."
Of course, you have to work the contact. If he bends for you once, return the next time you see him with a good thank-you bribe. In Iraq you can't use good beer - an almost universal bribe. But homemade cookies are a good bet. If he accepts those, you're set for any future encounter.
I'd like the story better if Mr big shot wound up eating sand. Can we get a re-do?
Sir, you are one of the FUNNIEST writers around. LOL. Thank you!
One of the reasons cops process you slooowly after you get a speeding ticket is to impress upon you, that if you had just followed the rules you'd be where you were going by now. If I was said GI, I'd politely remind the 'shotgun' of that fact and ask how long he thought the long way around the airfield would take: if the answer was 20 minutes, then I'd say, 'well we got a wait here for 21 minutes don't we', and then I'd still make 'em go back the long way around. Case closed, lesson learned, jerk punked.
Never ever pull the demanding DYKWIA routine if you haven't actually got the swing. And if you DO have the swing, you'll get a LOT farther a lot faster just being nice and polite anyway.
That was probably the delectable Jennifer Eccleston.
Wait, wait...I've got it! It was Christiana Amanpour at CNN? No?! OK, Howz about a PBS Frontline reporter?!!!
Argh, I give up.
Heh.
I believe that may have been Jennifer Eccelstone who now works for a (small furry animal)'s competitor.
Hah! Some of you are trying to trick me into saying which network it was! I ain't falling for it, I'm wise to your SLY approaches...
You know, I've been racking my brains trying to remember if I ever pulled this when I was a reporter way back when -- and I can't recall ever having done it. I think I'd remember.
The closest I ever came was when I was covering a fire at a local high school and the fire chief asked me if I thought I ought to get back to my classroom. My response was to introduce myself as: "Matt Hoy, reporter, Lompoc Record" and offer a handshake.
Never argue with anyone who enters the battle of wits unarmed. The 'trooper' should have taken the unarmed (ahole) reporters to a small dark room to think about it for a couple of hours. Being late is better than being dead, at least I think so, have been late but never been dead. I heard a general tell an SP that if 'you don't reconize someone, including me, you had better shoot them first and ask questions later'. Never try to force entry to a nuclear loaded aircraft alert facility. Old time B-47/B-52 Crew chief.
Don't know the "babe" but the guy sounds like Geraldo. Is there a bigger jerk on any network or cable news channel, I can't think of one. The MSM types (Williams, Couric, Blitzer, et.al.) are partisan and willingly ignorant of facts but I don't take them for egoists. It has to be Geraldo. [At least, I want it to be].
"Aha! (He slashes his sword on a tree.) Do you know what that is?" "Si, Senor, it is a 2." "No, it's a 'Z'." "No, Senor. That is how they teach my grandaughter in school to write a 2." "It's a 'Z'. I am Zorro." "Zorro! Zorro is back."
My personal rule for such bullies is to always call their bluff. Generally, whatever they are threatening you with is the scariest thing to them. If their scariest thing is calling their boss, you're probably dealing with a particularly weak wimp. Stay calm and polite and insist they make good on their threat. That's the last thing they expect and it's the last thing they want to do. It's particularly good if you act a little bored by it all because getting a reaction out of you is part of the thrill for them.
People who bully their way through everything have a short life span because sooner or later they run into somebody who will kick their ass but good. That's why bullies tend to be young and stupid and don't know how to handle themselves. Wise old operators are smooth and positive and charm you into conspiring with them to beat the bureaucracy.
I ran into this once while manning a road post in Mississippi after Hurricane Katrina. I had been instructed personally by the Chief of the Fire Dept that NOBODY was supposed to go into this particular area (I believe they were doing body recoveries).
I caught a lot of flack for this from a rather imperious woman in Donna Karan sunglasses who worked for a name-brand network I CaNNot name but which is fairly big in Atlanta. I bet she bitched endlessly about the halfwit cop, but she didn't get through.