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May 25, 2003

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A MUDVILLE SUNDAY

By Greyhawk

You don't need your Sunday Paper when you've got the Mudville Gazette!

Indiana Senator Dick Luger jammed his head further into his rectum then than any human in the history of the world today. Then from that position, in an effort to demonstate to the people of Indiana his flexibility and capacity to govern under any circumstances, he dictated a letter to the head of the General Accounting Office, the investigative arm of Congress, asking that he immediately begin assessing the security efforts, relief programs, economic development, procurement and political operations in Iraq.

More than a month after President Bush declared "the regime of Saddam Hussein is no more," Congress is more vigorously questioning why the administration's plan has failed to provide basic security and services in Iraq.

"It's part of the Senator's overall plan to completely and utterly self-destruct" said a spokesmoron."A plan he's been following religiously for some time. The Senator wishes to be seen as bi-partisan and reasonable, and realizes the Democrats have some valid concerns here. . Also, the Senator demands to know why Iraq isn't a free democracy yet, who really killed John Kennedy, and what's the truth about Roswell and that whole UFO thing."

"MMMMMfff yret" Added the Senator.

"What?" asked a reporter.

"mumblerfkfe vfdgeddy!" He repeated.

"I can't hear you sir"

"And the Yeti! I want to know the truth about the Yeti!"

Hey, speaking of rumors about gay Senators, circle the options that correctly complete the following:

TALLAHASSEE - U.S. Rep. Mark Foley took the offensive Thursday to address a question he acknowledged may affect his bid to become the [1. Republican/Democratic] nominee for the U.S. Senate: Is he gay?

The answer, Foley said, is that it's nobody's business but his own. He called the innuendo about his private life ''revolting and unforgivable,'' and blamed it on [2. Republican/Democratic] activists who fear his strength as a candidate.

Wrong! He's a Republican! Now all you Democrats out there wipe the circles off your computer moniters! Morons.

Hey, speaking of Democrats, when I'm not sure how to spell something I look it up. And if I make any mistakes on this website I can go back and change them with little effort. It's not like I'm carving in stone or something. This story also contains yet another use for duct tape.

(Go ahead, Democrats, if you've finished cleaning your screens please comb this page for spelling errors and typos.)

Hey, speaking of mistakes and disapointment, did you see where Jonathan Byrd, Rodney Pampling, J.J. Henry, Cameron Beckman, Paul Goydos, Tom Lehman, and Tom Pernice Jr all missed the cut at the $5 million Bank of America Colonial Open by one stroke? Man, that's close. That's gotta suck. I searched the web though and couldn't find any coments by them. I guess in America nobody cares if you can't make the cut, even if you're close. Well, you're all still better golfers then I could ever hope to be, that's for sure.

Speaking of disapointing loosers disappointing losers, I'm starting to think Jayson Blair has some issues. I mean, does he really think he can shock anybody with stories about the truth of what goes on at the NY Times? The paper he calls "my tormentor, my other drug, my slavemaster" Anybody out there who had faith in the New York Times even before the Blair story raise your hand. Okay Democrats, put your hands down now. I can't believe you raised them. Man you guys will fall for anything. Did you know the word "gullible" is not in any dictionary of the English Language?

And speaking of his roll model, hero, and subject of some of his fabricated stories, muslim sniper John Malvo, Jayson Blair says:

"The moment I began to see parallels between his life and mine was the moment things began falling apart." He writes of "how the frustrations of black men in this world can explode, crescendo into a huge rage that can manifest itself in some odd and sometimes unclear ways."

Of course he's probably lying, but any sensitive, caring American would recognoze recognize this as an anguished cry for help. This is how I hear it: "Help me, Rev Jackson! Help me, Rev Sharpton!"

Sorry, Mr Blair, The Times is on their side! (Why does that sound Ebonic?)

Still on the topic of losing, in addition to Blair The NY Times has lost one more reporter and one libel suit.

Fortunately they've gained Ooglay Hussein!

Speaking of gullibility and the Hussein boys, did you see where Uday was contemplating surrender? He just wants to be assured he'll be well treated if he does.

This situation is complicated by a language barrier, communications infrastructure problems, some religeous issues, and the fact that Uday has been dead for quite some time.


Posted by Greyhawk / May 25, 2003 1:28 AM | Permalink

8 Comments

erm....no offense--

"Speaking of disapointing loosers"

should be

"Speaking of disappointing losers".

Sorry, no Democrat here, but love a challenge when I see one:
please comb this page for spelling errors and typos
So here's one for you:
any sensitive, caring American would recognoze this
Recognoze??

"Indiana Senator Dick Luger jammed his head further into his rectum then any human in the history of the world today" Should read "than".

"And speaking of his roll model, hero, and subject of some of his fabricated stories, muslim sniper John Malvo, Jayson Blair says:" -- you meant role, not roll, right?

Okay! It was suposed to be democrats only but now you've forced me to open it up to everyone! Fresh errors added. Have at 'em. ('Suposed' doesn't count. that was a tease. Hah!)

Greyhawk:

Senator Richard LUGAR,(R) IN, (NOT Luger), has done a lot for the State of Indiana, (and for the City of Indianapolis, when he was Mayor)!Certainly MUCH more than Senator Evan Bayh,(D) IN, who just voted for President Bush's tax cut, then, voted against it, causing the Vice-President to vote to break the tie!

Not quite sure of your story's meaning?

Per your request:

"in an effort to demonstate"---demonstrate

"speaking of mistakes and disapointment"--there's that word again--"disappointment"

"his roll model"--still says "roll" not "role"

"some religeous issues"--religious

::smirks::

Susan Serin Done
I like Lugar (or thought I did. I liked the Dixie Chicks when they sang the National Anthem at the Super Bowl too.) That's why I'm confused at his recent behavior. Is it part of a larger Republican strategy? If so okay, but that smacks too much of conspiracy theory stuff. Lugar seems determined to be a Republican thorn in Bush's side, and has become a media darling as a result. I respect free thinking from any side of an issue, and I'm geographically removed and not privvy to much info, perhaps you can enlighten?
v/r

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November 26, 2010


America@war
[Greyhawk]
I think anyone who's ever pondered the "comment" option - once only available on blogs and bulletin boards, now ubiquitous on almost any web site - will appreciate this:
The so-called faculty of writing is not so much a faculty of writing as it is a faculty of thinking. When a man says, "I have an idea but I can't express it"; that man hasn't an idea but merely a vague feeling. If a man has a feeling of that kind, and will sit down for a half an hour and persistently try to put into writing what he feels, the probabilities are at least 90 percent that he will either be able to record it, or else realize that he has no idea at all. In either case, he will do himself a benefit.

That's wisdom from the past, captured for posterity at the US Naval Institute, shared via the web on the institute's 137th anniversary.

From their about page:

The Naval Institute shall remain

INDEPENDENT - A non-profit member association, with no government support, that does not lobby for special interests;

NON-PARTISAN - An independent, professional military association with a mission, goals and objectives that transcend political affiliations; and shall encourage

IDEAS - Through its respected journals Proceedings and Naval History, its conferences, its books and its online content, in support of those who serve.

"The Naval Institute has three core activities," among them, History and Preservation:

The Naval Institute also has recently introduced Americans at War, a living history of Americans at war in their own words and from their own experiences. These 90-second vignettes convey powerful stories of inspiration, pride, and patriotism.

Take a look at the collection, and you'll see it's not limited to accounts from those who served on ships at sea, members of the other branches are well-represented.

I'm fortunate to have met USNI's Mary Ripley, she's responsible for the institute's oral history program (and she's the daughter of the late John Ripley, whose story is told here). She also deserves much credit for their blog. ("We're not the Navy nor any government agency. Blog and comment freely.") We met at a milblog conference - Mary knew (and I would come to realize) that milbloggers are the 21st-century version of exactly what the US Naval Institute is all about. Once that light bulb came on in my head, I mentioned a vague idea for a project to her - milblogs as the 21st century oral history that they are.

"Put that in writing," she said (of course - see first paragraph above!) - and here's part of the result.

Shortly after the first tent was pitched by the American military in Iraq a wire was connected to a computer therein, and the internet was available to a generation of Americans at war - many of whom had grown up online. From that point on, at any given moment, somewhere in Iraq a Soldier, Sailor, Airman or Marine was at a keyboard sharing the events of his or her day with the folks back home. While most would simply fire off an email, others took advantage of the (then) relatively new online blogging platforms to post their thoughts and experiences for the entire world to see. The milblog was born - and from that moment to this stories detailing everything from the most mundane aspects of camp life to intense combat action (often described within hours of the event) have been available on the web...

And et cetera - but since you're reading this on a milblog, you probably knew that. And you know that milblogs aren't just blogs written by troops at war, that many friends, family members, and supporters likewise documented their story of America at war online in near-real time, as those stories developed.

The diversity in membership of that group is broad, the one thing we all have in common is the impulse to make sense of the seemingly senseless, and communicate the tale - for each of us that impulse was strong enough to overcome whatever barriers prevent the vast majority of people from doing the same. Everyone at some point has some vague idea they believe should be shared - we were the people who, from some combination of internal and external urging, found and spent those many half hours persistently trying to write it down.

*****

But where will all that be in another 137 years? Or five or ten, for that matter. That's something I've asked myself since at least 2004 - when I wrote this:

Closing Blogs is nothing new. So many site's owners just give up on their own. They come and go, you know, these MilBloggers do. Like any other sort of blogger. Many post in the lonely down hours far from home, spill their guts for the world, then abandon their spots when the tour of duty is up. They have lives again somewhere in the world, and no need to share the details. So it goes.

Many are truly gone - no site left at all. "The page cannot be found." Other blogs remain, like abandoned defensive positions in shifting desert sands.

Membership in the ghost battalion has grown in the years since, and an ever growing majority of those abandoned-but-still-standing sites are vanishing. Have you checked out Lt Smash's site lately? How about Sgt Hook's? If you're a long-time milblog reader you know the first widely-read milblog from Operation Iraq Freedom and the first widely-read milblog from Afghanistan are both gone from the web. If you're a relative newcomer to this world you may never even have heard of them - or the dozens upon dozens of others who carried forth the standard they set down.

If you have a vague notion that something should be done about that, (a notion I've heard expressed more than once...) then you and I and the good folks at the US Naval Institute are in agreement. Preserving the history documented by the milbloggers is just one of the goals of the milblog project, the once-vague idea that we're now making real.

And it's a big idea, if I say so myself - too big to explain in one simple blog post, so stand by for more. Likewise, it's too big a task to be accomplished by just one person. So if you're a milblogger (and exactly what is a milblogger? is a topic for much further discussion on its own) I'm asking for your help. All I'll really need is just a little bit (maybe just one or two of those half hours...) of your time, and your willingness to tell the tale.

We've already made history, it's time to save it.

(More to follow...)




Posted 4:02 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) |

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The Mudville Gazette is the on-line voice of an American warrior and his wife who stands by him. They prefer to see peaceful change render force of arms unnecessary. Until that day they stand fast with those who struggle for freedom, strike for reason, and pray for a better tomorrow.
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  • Greyhawk: Susan Serin Done I like Lugar (or thought I did. read more
  • serenity: Per your request: "in an effort to demonstate"---demonstrate "speaking of read more
  • Susan Serin-Done: Greyhawk: Senator Richard LUGAR,(R) IN, (NOT Luger), has done a read more
  • Greyhawk: Okay! It was suposed to be democrats only but now read more
  • TewKewl: "And speaking of his roll model, hero, and subject of read more
  • S Mc: "Indiana Senator Dick Luger jammed his head further into his read more
  • Gary: Sorry, no Democrat here, but love a challenge when I read more
  • serenity: erm....no offense-- "Speaking of disapointing loosers" should be "Speaking of read more

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The Mudville Gazette is written and produced by Greyhawk, who recently retired from 24 years of active duty in the US military, but will maintain this disclaimer: Unless otherwise credited, the opinions expressed are those of the author, and nothing here is to be taken as representing the official position of or endorsement by the United States Department of Defense or any of its subordinate components.

Furthermore, I will occasionally use satire or parody herein. The bottom line: it's my house.

I like having visitors to my house. I hope you are entertained. I fight for your right to free speech, and am thrilled when you exercise said rights here. Comments and e-mails are welcome, but all such communication is to be assumed to be 1)the original work of any who initiate said communication and 2)the property of the Mudville Gazette, with free use granted thereto for publication in electronic or written form. If you do NOT wish to have your message posted, write "CONFIDENTIAL" in the subject line of your email.

Original content copyright © 2003 - 2011 by Greyhawk. Fair, not-for-profit use of said material by others is encouraged, as long as acknowledgement and credit is given, to include the url of the original source post. Other arrangements can be made as needed.

Contact: greyhawk at mudvillegazette dot com

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*****

Tending Distant
Fires


Far from hearth and home, watching
Cold alone but not alone
On distant shore and only wanting
Safe return and little more

What tales we'll tell
When that time comes
When tales can be told

When things grim
Seem far away
When other fires go cold

Some distant sunset, vision fading
Memories remain
And tired eyes gaze 'pon folded flags
While distant drums beat their refrain

Saluting fallen friends whose names
And youth will never fade
Here's to those on other shores,
for them live well, the price is paid

- Greyhawk,
Baghdad,
December 2004